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July 06, 2006

When Monogamy becomes Monotony.


In this age of the internet that we find ourselves in, it's sometimes easy to forget that there is a world outside of these tubes (Link) that connect us. For the purposes of this article we're going to call this world the "Real World", not to be confused with a certain MTV show that should haven given up 10 seasons ago. In this Real World people occasionally want to meet, fall in love, get married, have kids & live happily ever after. Most people. But there are some for whom this isn't enough. They want to meet other attached people & presumably fuck. Skipping all those nuisances like talking, loving & getting to know the person. Additionally, there are single people who are looking specifically for attached people to copulate with. Now I know you dear readers & I know your hearts. I know that this is not the type of behavior your condone. But, should the spirit move you, have I found a dating site for you. It's called The Ashley Madison Agency, a place for "Women seeking Romantic Affairs - and men who want to fulfill them."
The best part is, I'm sure you're thinking, Only in America, right? Wrong. It's Canadian. Not a real country (Link)*, I know, but still our frosty neighbors to the North.
Now your probably wondering, how the hell can they justify this? And let me answer that. It doesn't matter .. This is capitalism at it's finest. But, at the very least, let's take a look at an article that's posted on their website that helps substantiate their legitimacy.
It starts, and I quote...
"For most biologists, the fact that the Rev. Jesse Jackson had an illegitimate child by one of his staffers is neither surprising nor a revelation. We've known for a long time that males from many species tend to be interested in sexual variety, particularly in having more than one partner.

Consider, for instance, this story: A missionary visited a Maori village in 19th century New Zealand and there was a feast in his honor. After the feast, the Maori chief called out, "A woman for the bishop." Noting the scowl on the prelate's face, the obliging chief roared again, even louder: "Two women for the bishop!"

Given the choice, most men would rather have two women than one (although not necessarily at the same time). And they'd rather have three than two. As Margaret Mead once pointed out, monogamy is the most difficult of all marital arrangements. For some time, biologists have had a good idea why. Men are sperm makers. Sperm are cheap and easily replaced. Unlike eggs, they do not require that the guy doing the fertilizing become pregnant, give birth and then nurse his young."


It's not a penis, it's a giant (well in my case) sperm making machine.
Now, those of you who have kept reading this far are probably wondering how I stumbled upon this gem? Is it that I am considering this & have the testicular fortitude to broadcast it to all the tubes (Link, again) of the internet? Heck no. I was reading a site called Totse (Link) about some guy's heroin addiction. Apparently that's a hard drug to quit.

(Link - Totse)
(Link - The Ashley Madison Agency)

*Yes, I used a South Park song lyric to justify calling Canada a fake country.

Wikipedia, spreading misinformation one post at a time.

Ok, well, not all the time. But letting anyone & everyone edit stuff hasn't exactly gone smoothly all the time. Some examples, government tampering (Link) & the Ass-Clown Jack Thompson (Link) just to name a few. Well, with such an awesome formula as this, what better genre to create a new Wikipedia for, than politics? We all know politicians are straight shooters & that a site like this wouldn't automatically go partisan! Seriously. Any idiot that's spent even the briefest amount of time paying attention to politics knows this idea is not as sound as the powers at be would have you believe. The mission statement is located here (Link) & I'd like to quote a little from it. On July 4th, Jimmy Wales writes, "I will frankly admit right up front: I don't know how to make politics healthier. But, I believe that you do. I believe that together we can work, this very election season, to force campaigns to use wikis and blogs to organize, discuss, manage, lead and be led by their volunteers."
Right, so it's going to be all wine & roses. Finally a place to get non-partisan, independent views on all things political. After all these years of having to figure it out for myself, like the informed voter I am, I can instead just look it up. Thank GOD!
In an article on News.com (Link) Mr. Wales waxes poetic about what he hopes to accomplish, "Whoever you are and whatever you believe, you can share with me my sincere desire that the process starts to be about substance and thought, rather than style and image."
Good luck with that. Cynical? Sure. We'll keep our eyes on it.